Episode 19: Reframing Male Sexuality and Outperforming a Pornstar with Cam Fraser

podcast Dec 07, 2020

Reframing Male Sexuality and Outperforming a Pornstar with Cam Fraser

Kendall: Today, we have an incredible guest coming all the way from Australia. His name is cam Fraser and he is Australia's leading sex coach sexologist. 

I would love for you to just jump right in and tell us a little bit about your background, who you are, how you've come to this space and really what your mission is on the planet and how you bring that light onto the world.

Cam: I studied psychology and philosophy over in America. It was in rural Georgia and the tagline of the school was unapologetically Baptist. It was very religiously conservative. The class that I took there, that really kind of sparked my interest in pursuing human sexuality in an academic sense was called Christian approaches to human sexuality. There was a complete lack of education around contraception and sexual health. I was kind of putting all the pieces together like, whoa, this is kind of happening for these young people and here's the education that they're getting around sex. There's a huge parallel between those two things and a light bulb went off and I was like, wow, there are people out here that need education around sexual health and sexuality and how to express their sexuality and how to interact with people that they're attracted and how to move sexual energy through their body.

I graduated with a degree in psychology, wanted to continue studying the academic side of things. Pursued counseling, pursued mental health, sexology, got a postgraduate degree, but it was also at the same time studying, I got my yoga accreditation to become a yoga teacher, was studying meditation, studying not only classical tantra from the philosophical aspect, but also like Neo tantra, California style tantra, it's like that sacred sexuality.

I wanted to niche in cisgender heterosexual men, sex coaching, which is why I call myself a men's sex coach. I'm a cisgender heterosexual, probably a heteroflexible if I really, you know, I think about it. That's why I think my work has resonated with a lot of men, particularly kind of men between that 20 to 35 age bracket, is because I speak to things that are quite universal experiences that are quite common for men of that age. That's kind of my mission at the moment is to, on a personal level kind of speak to myself 10 years ago. By virtue of doing that, just kind of challenging narratives around masculinity and sexuality and the link, the, in the intersection between those two things.

Some of the topics we cover are:

  • How did Cam get into the work that he does today?
  • How his college education sparked his interest in pursuing human sexuality?
  • How did Cam overcome his mental health struggles?
  • What the crossover is between the physical feelings and physical sensations such as mention and emotional sensations?
  • Who are his typical clients and how does he support them?
  • How does he challenge the narratives around masculinity and sexuality and how are the two connected?
  • How does sexual energy to activate the light within people?
  • How can men reframe their beliefs around self-pleasure?
  • How porn can perpetuate negative beliefs around male sexuality?
  • How do you acknowledge your partner's vulnerability?
  • And so much more!

Memorable Moments:

  • "...there are people out here that need education around sexual health and sexuality and how to express their sexuality and how to interact with people that they're attracted and how to move sexual energy through their body" -Cam
  • "...help shift and reframe that perspective is to say there's so much more to experience when it comes to pleasure different than just focusing on that end goal" - Kendall
  • "I think another thing that tends to kind of get in the way of shifting from that pleasure over performance perspective is presence and being really rooted in the present moment" - Kendall
  • "One of the pieces of advice that I give to guys is when they start maybe feeling a bit of performance anxiety, or they, they start getting in their head when they're being sexual with their partner or by themselves, is to bring themselves back to their fingertips, bring themselves back to their hands, So start touching something, touching their chest, touching their partner, touching an object..." -Cam

Connect with Cam

In light, in love, and in gratitude, K

 
If you loved this episode I’d deeply appreciate you subscribing and leaving a 5 star review and please share this with someone who will resonate with this episode today!
Find out more on my website: www.soulsaturations.com

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